( + - The Significant Other Survey - +)

I'm stuck in an excruciating boring teleconference THXSmartRevenue! Instead of looking at powerpoints, I'll do a survey and email it to Troy later. He might like it heheh.

Basics
Who's the lucky catch: Trout? Sea Bass? mine's human

First Name: Troy

Middle Name: Benjamin

Date of Birth: November 28, 1979

Age: dirty 30

Sign: too legit to quit Sagittarius

Height: 6'0 - vertically gifted!

Weight: 190ish - horizontally perfect praisesweetlawdbabyjesus!

Hometown: vancleave, shitsasippi and his momma

Measurements
Pantsize: 32
shirt size: M
shoe size:10.5
chest: 42
arms:16
hat size: 7

colour hair: blond, lol highlight mr. frosty days were in college

colour eyes: blue

About Him
Are you both from the same town?: lol, i'm a city girl from Detroit and a Yankee. He's a pure southern boy from Biloxi. We don't make his kind up here in these parts

Does he have any siblings?: older sis, 2 older step siblings. aww my baby is the baby!

What are his parents like?: Troy says, mom is more innocent and dad is a riot

What are his favorite things to do in his spare time?: me jk, workout, mini, paint, football, jesus. i mean he doesn't DO jesus ... errr

Does he have a job?: yes hes a professional person

What are his career plans?: hes a defunct financial adviser; and is a manager at the casino, thinking of dabbling into real estate property investments ... my babydaddy

What languages does he speak?: body language, french, teeny tagalog, and fast english. if he talks slow he sounds country ahaha.

i teach him some tagalog, he's so cute. uh except for that time he called me "pookie" as a term of endearment ... his reaction was priceless "baby I didn't mean to call you a pussy, I didn't know!!" he better not say that in front of my mom or in the Philippines. now he'll just say it on purpose, punkassbuttmunch

Does he have any pets?: he wants another rescue greyhound and I get to name it kitten! and my vagina does not count ... as a pet or a kitten! even if he wants to pet MY kitten.

who's his best friend?: this asian girl named misa, hunter his bestie since 2nd grade, and blaine who completed his male bff trifecta in college when they played fball.

How does he style his hair?: flat irons it. but as a practical joke, I'll replace his flat iron with a crimper!! Spudgy would spank me for that too ... totally worth it though

Is it long or short?: ... umm what are we talking about here? 7.5?

What is his build?: yummy rawr. from lego blocks. he's kinda square, i mean troy IS a republican.

Does he care about the way he looks?: I care b/c I don't have cataracts, and his hobbies include tanning and waxing.

What is his dress sense like?: undress ... at the address ... stylewise fabulous! he's the only one I know who will spend $200 on jeans

Is he fit?: former captain of college football team and triathlete, uh yea. gym nazi. thankfully he hasn't turned al bundy yet...

Do people think he is good-looking?: this girl was hitting on him at work like "you look like the guy from the bachelor" bitch. I own his soul, and the rest of him! jk, um kinda.

Does he smoke or drink?: smokes cigars on occasion with the boys, drinks yes. once drinks lead to cubans ... on the balcony ... undressed

what does he drink: toilet water, that's why he thinks its beautiful when its blue. the bluer the cleaner, fresher, and tastier! no household cleaning products. he makes a great martini, corona preferred, wine, and anything

You and Him

How did you meet?: funny thing called fate... I said a lil prayer about nothing in particular, just open to anything ... that night there he was. cute. sweet. funny. and fucking retarded.

Where did you meet?: at a xchange conference located in the taproom. he found me in between in my legs, duh. he was cold.

Were you set up or did you meet randomly? randomly and setup. He'll tell his parents he ordered me, I'll play along with it, they'll believed it. we'll just say it was a lotto drawing for asian spouse picking. setup was all that higher power supreme being universe god stuff

Who else was around when you met? Perverts with penises and fake lesbians and Jesus fo sheezy

when is your anniversary: october 28 feast of st Jude! <3

What attracted you to him physically?: helloooo...he was shirtless. so everything.

What attracted you to him personality wise?: crazy, goofy, hilarious, humble, sweet, witty, retarded, makes me smile for no reason, kindness, family oriented, loves god

What attracted him to you physically? hot asian duh

What attracted him to you personality wise?: strong in faith, funny, kid voice is crazy cute, retarded, sexy, honesty, compassion, ability to make him smile ( he's tells all of this and makes me all smitten like a turd)

Are you in love?: in, under, on top, whatever position you call it.

What are your favorite things to do together?: the dishes!!

Do you ever think about marrying him?: about a month knowing each other he says "we're gonna get married someday" ... I say "serious? seriously?? you've been drinking again". baby never ceases to amaze me ... to have a family with him, I'd be a lucky girl for the rest of my life.

What about having children together?: he wants me to spit out 4 more pretty babies, i'd like to adopt a couple more, and he thinks he won't retire LOL. we discussed becoming foster parents later on in our lives...

Do you trust him? he doesn't have a trust fund. of course, we have this connection and are so alike its uncanny. except well i'm asian with girl parts and he's white with boy parts. he's amazing to me and for me. I trust him with every part of me, including my important girl parts.

Would you share a toothbrush with him? sure, but there's a slim chance of that. Turns out we both have a quirk of having 2 toothbrushes, one in the shower and one in the sink.

Does he let you wear his pants? no, 1) wont fit and I'd drown it'd go up to my boobs 2) he knows i hate wearing pants 3) pants are an obstacle to the goal.

Do you like the way he smells? Is this a pheromone thing? Should he do a mating dance or call? If I won't mind wearing his shirts, I have to like the way he smells ...and I don't have a sinus problem

What bothers you the most about him? nothing, he's even perfectly flawed. unconditional love makes me overlook the methodist republican broccoli and mushroom hater

Does he have a temper? he's really quite passive, I'm the temperamental on. user beware.

Are you happy to be with him? shitting sunshine and rainbows happy absolutely fucktastic. truly blessed. I haven't been felt prolonged happiness in a long time until my pumpkins. just the thought of him :)

Does he embarrass you in public? whatchu talkin bout willis? impossible, I do that too ... we're both crazy outrageous and like pranks. um so we're trouble together

Does he have any piercings?: not anymore, tongue before. He's NOT getting a matching navel piercing ... couples shouldn't do that. if he wants to get ears pierced, its up to him, as long as his earrings aren't bigger than mine.

Tattoos: I'm a card carrying member of "people with tattoos are much more fun to look at naked" . Spudgy has 2: one on ankle the other on back shoulder. He's going for #3 on the side of his rib cage in his dad's last name. I also make great sharpie graffiti art! Who woulda thunk it, I have more ... hehe

Is he a Party dude or Stay at home? he's the life of the party! but he has his homebody moments ... he does party a lot for an old guy, must be that 30 denial.

Is he Outgoing or Shy? outgoing. ummm but I think he'd prefer to be incumming

Wear boxers/briefs? boxer-briefs but hates to wear underwear in bed unless there's a reason to. his mom said he was a nudist baby lol. definitely poses a sleep issue for me, I won't leave troy alone!

Favorite color: blue, just not blue balls or blue smurfs.cookie monster is blue, he loves that fucker

Normal Outfit:
work: suit with button down.
gym: shorts, muscle shirt, asics, FL gators hat.
out: fitted stylish shirt and expensive jeans.
home: undies or just pajama pants

Is there anything you wish was different? different Strokes for different folks

Do you see a real, successful future together?of course, he saw it before I did. my ovaries are still good, sexual prime, money, god, honesty, love, football, faith, honesty, it works.

what did he fear as a child: lizards. actually he still hates them. lol wait until he goes to the Philippines and sees the "house lizards"

How long into the relationship was your first argument? HA! couple days.. but it was a misunderstanding/miscommunication. he actually likes to mess with me because he thinks i'm adorable and sexy while mad. ehh sicko. we dont really argue. I hope to never again.

Do you like the same sports teams? Troy: <3's the NOLA saints and Florida Gators. Misa: <3 red wings

What makes him so amazing? grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wrench like meeee

Does he bring out the best in you? He's trying to bring out babies in me. better that than gremelins. or aliens. or puppies

Do or did you celebrate monthly anniversaries? yes. he loves to and will remind me of it. it's absolutely adorable, and I love it. you'd think he was a teenage girl lol. if he has a crush on justin bieber its over. it make me look forward to our 1 year :)

Have you ever broken up and got back together? like humpty dumpty?

What sweet names or nick names do you call each other? baby, punkin ... he calls me dear, precious, and kitten/kitty. I call him beh and spudgy LOL

Can you talk to him about anything? in english ... i'm terrible at speaking southern country... but no subject matter is off limits, he knows things about me others don't. I feel like we have a level of understand and empathy.

Can you trust him with your deepest secret? its like a treasure hunt to find my deepest secret, x marks the g-spot duhh. but in all seriousness, yes. he's nothing but supportive. i've been comforted and consoled with gentleness. i don't think i could handle being with someone and not sharing things, even secrets. but not sharing stds.

Can you share your every thought without questioning yourself? as opposed to exclaiming myself? Once a month I am perioding myself.

Would you take a bullet for him? to what? use as a suppository?

If you didn't have sex with him, would you cheat, or wait? sex? whoa what's that?! no cheating, damn thing called morals. and he's even understanding about waiting.

Whats most important to you in a relationship? a heterosexual fuckable male.he also has to love me, jesus, babies, furball pets etc. give to others. honesty. but definitely love. lotsa lotsa love.

Is it love or lust? I LOVE LAMP!

Do you really know the difference? i like pretty chandeliers, and candle light too.

Who gave whom their phone number first? he gave me his, so we won't "discuss in an argumentative way". But I think I saw it written on the bathroom wall in a dirty bar next too a free paternity testing hotline.

Was the 3-day phone rule used? more like 3 minute. i called him right away. i couldn't wait, it was the element of surprise! you mean for pregnancy tests, right?

Anything you wish to change about him? i'm not changing his diaper, he may be old ... but not until he's lost usage of his hands and seen a urologist.

What attracted you the most? his aerolas silly. and his aura. its magenta in color.it glows in the dark.

Did you ever get butterflies? definitely not cockroaches. i'm allergic to cockroaches, dust, and cotton wood trees.

What are your intentions? ^_^ take over the world, I got his soul already muuahaha

Would you say your relationship is growing? in my tummy for 3 trimesters. and in his pants. kinda like Pinocchio syndrome. it flares up quite a bit.

If not, what would make it better? fertilizer. no horse manure, sun, water, TLC (not the group or channel)

Have you discussed childrens names together? like hansel and gretal? There's Jaxon, he's a cute minor.

Has he bought you any jewelry? a cockring in a crackerjack box from walmart *sobs* and I asked for an asscher cut tacori, size 5.5 white gold! so far i've gotten phone rings *pouts*

Does he get along with your friends and family? He's pretty easy to get along with, just not easy. thank you lord sweet baby jesus. He's not gonna fornicate friends and family.

Would you live together before marriage? that's a nono. its against the terms of the contract. seriously. but cohabitation is a great idea, just not for us. maybe slumber parties.

Where was your 1st date? Phone sex

Where did your 1st kiss take place? He tongued his iPhone while I was falling asleep. and this was before mms! and now facetime will be released later ... maybe we'll upgrade to facetime lol.

Who said I Love You 1st? he did, while pleasantly intoxicated after his bday party. He listed reasons about things he adored about me and said I'm retardedly falling in love with you everyday... 3 weeks after meeting. left me speechless ...

Where is he right now? trying to get back in his mom's uterus. she's hitting him with a fly swatter saying, "now benjamin!!"

Who pays the bills? i prefer the finance major guy do it thanks. I also don't pay toms and bobs and johns

Who makes more money? depends who's working the street corner that week, and if he does sexy calendar poses with the vintage camaro

Who drives when you are together? like USB drive? sex drive? screw drive?

who pays when you two go out to dinner? the tooth fairy.

Who's more sensitive? um we're both pubic regional area sensitive? all nerves seem to be intact. we're human, he's not a robot. he thinks i'm an illegal alien, but its not like ET aliien so I am able to feel physically and emotionally

Who has more friends? i do. me asian. 2 dolla

Was it love at first sight? it was oooh he's hot, halfnaked, and not 19 at first sight for me. For him it was, whoa I luv this hot asian ho. LOL we're retarded

Do you know everything there is to know about him? he was born a boy. housebroken. US citizen. fluent in english. passed my mental competency exam, background check. up to date on immunizations. clean bill of health TBD

Do you believe he is your soulmate? all of my shoes have those. as far as Mr. Benjamin, he's mineminemine! Troy also signed the dotted line and transferred possession of his soul to me. I tried to give it back, but he's supposed to be around if I need him, even when the real deal isn't. His soul will shovel snow, make me hot chocolate, and sleep on the floor when he's bad. Troy makes me feel whole, like there's not this missing puzzle part of me... fuck I feel like happy crying.

Is he the best thing that ever happened to you? not getting stuck in the birth canal is the best thing that's ever happened to me. but he ranks up there. runner up. mister congeniality too.

He is watching TV... What is he watching? He's watching a thingy expecting moving pictures and sound to come out. Thomas the train, football, All my children...

You're out to eat. What kind of dressing do he get on his salad? Polyester and spandex. silk was too expensive.

What's one food this person doesn't like? Green trees. It gives him nightmare. and their relatives white trees.

You go out to the bar. He orders...... A midget, tinsel, a martini, wd40, a unicorn

If this person were to collect anything, it would be... Pound puppies and My little ponies ... herpes

What is his favorite type of sandwich? an asian sandwich

This person could eat ______ everyday. a female anatomical part

This person wouldn't be caught dead wearing? penis extenders

Who will he/she vote for? Sex, sleep, snuggling, some republican

What is something you do that he/she wishes you didn't? be asian

How many states has this person lived in? 1:retardedness?

What is his/her heritage? retardedness, irish, German

You bake them a cake for their birthday. What kind do you bake? Cookie cake shaped vagina

Did he/she play sports in high school? masturbation, baseball, football

This person could spend hours... Breathing, copulating, snuggling, sleeping

If money wasn't an option, I would buy him... A designer jock strap with matching man purse- fanny pack. my little ponies. Furbies. pumas. a land rover. a hamster. a vacation for us in Boracay!

Do the 2 of you like the same things? I like Asian girls too

Do you 2 have any inside jokes? inside? like him inside me?? O_o also fire hydrant, hostess products

Favorite clothing Brand? Affliction, RL polo, sheer buttnaked nudity, lingerie

Favorite Food? Small children, lil red riding hood, mango chicken, belly button lint, chocolate chip cookies heh

Favorite Thing to do? make things to do lists

Favorite Band? rubber bands, shiny wedding bands

Whats your favorite thing about him? rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens. he calls me kitten but I don't have whiskers ... I get places waxed! What isn't my favorite thing about him, really?

What does he do to make you smile? purchases toothpaste, mouth wash, dental floss ... oral hygiene is important!

What do you guys like to do together? give off carbon dioxide

Has he ever hurt you? no whips, not into s&m ... not emotionally, not yet

Do you guys have any songs? like mating calls? Rascal Flatt's God Bless the Broken Road does remind me of us though ...

IS IT TRUE LOVE? its fake hate

Do you think he will read this survey? shit, idk if he can read. he's a jock goodness. i'm smart asian silly. idk i'm basically doing it out of sheer boredom during an excruciating teleconference. maybe i'll email it to him or post it up on the blog. i'd never post it up online like ms / fb anyway.